Archive for November, 2021

For my Aunt Carol

Monday, November 29th, 2021

Just so you can see it. Kitchen …

Monday, November 29th, 2021

My Thanksgiving sucked.

I basically had a 6 ft 4 ” (1.93 meters for everyone doing math the correct way) that naturally weighs in at 260 pounds (117 kg) walk around my apartment complex blackoutted drunk. He pounded on doors, windows, screamed at tenants, postured, verbally threatened and intimidated tenants and security. But then he would stumble back into his apartment before cops arrived.

I couldn’t get him arrested despite showing cops videos of what he was going walking around.

It stunk.

I spent 3 hours crafting a sentence on an IR that would legally hold my company responsible if this man comes through my door to get me. (As he put it, “I do not like people calling the cops on me.”) I had a lot of outside help doing this. I am grateful for people smarter than myself.

I recognize it is a gamble. I know it will put me on my COO’s radar. I am sleeping with a taser next to my pillow and constantly calculating how many seconds he can have his hands on me before I am knocked unconscious (since I do not know how long it will take for the taser to stop his muscle control). That is a worst case scenario, but I must be ready for it.

I hope everyone else had a nice holiday. Today is like my first day off in like 9 days? 11 days? I have lost count.

I should add that the first weekend that this man moved into the complex, he targeted me because I refused to come into his apartment to do repairs alone while he was intoxicated. (He tried to take my job at that point. Thank God for IRs and screenshots.) He did not succeed at getting me fired.

Going to the beach did not suck. Our beaches up here are cold. empty. But for a bit, I couldn’t hear a human. Only the water. The sound of change …

You are nothing but …

Thursday, November 18th, 2021

Paper work for the divorce printed. My ex to took me to a Fed Ex shipping place. We signed the final documents, made the copies and turned it in to the courthouse.

…. and, of course, Jack starts talking about the “bad months” that are “starting to splash against his consciousness.”

And all I am thinking is …

  1. I got the paperwork signed before it was too late.
  2. I am not there to be a target of his rage.

Today, I only have to function from 4 to 4:30 PM to help a staff member with his timecard. Then I can rest this evening, I can try to relax — drink a ginger kabocha to help with feeling physically unwell.

I haven’t been able to focus my brain because when I try to think, my only thought was: get the divorce finished before NOVEMBER! (Well. I almost did.)

Jack will start seeing his therapist 3 to 5 times a week for the next few months … Maybe the Beast will not come out to play. Maybe the man of God will stay quiet. Maybe evil Jack will not show up at my door. For now, I do not have to worry about those things.

And on February 20, 2022, I am free.

I should be celebrating, but all I can do is sob.

Once again

Thursday, November 18th, 2021

My Aunt Patty called me to remind me that I haven’t updated by blog in a month. (facepalm) I’ll have more to update in approximately two hours; however, yes, I am alive.